


Charming, But Insane

by The_Anglophile



Category: David Bowie (Musician), Iggy Pop/The Stooges
Genre: Glam Rock, M/M, Proto-Punk, Warnings at END of fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-06
Updated: 2013-12-06
Packaged: 2018-01-03 15:56:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,179
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1072353
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Anglophile/pseuds/The_Anglophile
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Iggy decides to pay David a visit while they're both in L.A., attracting the attention of the cops in the process.  Shenanigans ensue!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Charming, But Insane

**Author's Note:**

> I didn't know at the time I wrote this that David couldn't swim till the 80s, so let's just say he could...
> 
> 2013: This is one of my older fic (written around 2004), so it doesn't represent my current writing abilities. It was pretty popular back when I posted it to LJ, though, so I am adding it to the Archive in the hope that it will be enjoyed for what it is.
> 
> Warning at the end of the fic.

Iggy was on something when he woke up. He knew that much. He couldn’t remember what it was though. He just hoped it wasn’t something he’d been trying to get off of.

Whatever it was made his extremities feel tingly. He liked that. He stretched his legs out and splayed his toes and he could almost feel every separate muscle going about its job. Even his brain felt tingly.

He got abruptly off the cushy sofa and began to stalk restlessly around on the big fuzzy rug in the middle of the room, watching the bright midday sun reflecting blindingly off of the white tile floor. The house seemed to be empty. How boring.

He wanted to talk to someone... but who? Aha! He remembered the phone number in his pocket that he’d got off some chick the night before. He pulled out the slip of paper and grabbed the telephone from the coffee table.

It rang. And rang. And rang, and rang, and rang. After about fifteen rings it finally occurred to Iggy that the girl was probably not home and he hung up. He tugged repetitively at the neck of his t-shirt as he tried to think of someone else to call, his big eyes blinking rapidly, looking at nothing in particular.

Davey! He was in L.A. too right now. _I’ll call him!_ Iggy thought. He stumbled to his feet and retrieved the phonebook to look up the house David was staying in. It wasn’t far away, actually. He dialled the number.

Four rings and then a richly layered British voice answered. “Hello?”

“Hey, you crazy space bitch!” Iggy greeted the man on the other end of the line. There was a pause, then Iggy heard a muffled sigh.

“Jim, you’re high,” David said wearily, “You know I don’t like talking to you when you’re like this.”

Well, the Space Bitch was certainly living up to his name, Iggy thought. “What’s your problem? Got your spaceship up your ass?”

“I’m going, Jim. Goodbye.”

“I KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE!” Iggy yelled into the receiver before David hung up on him. _That dick is no fun,_ he thought sullenly, dropping the receiver onto the cradle. He sulked for a while, his arms wrapped around his legs, head on his knees. Quite suddenly he remembered the wonderful fact that there was a car in the driveway and the key to that car was hanging on a hook by the door. Time to pay Davey a visit!

 

David hung up the phone irritably. He was NOT in the mood for annoying phone calls. Even from Jim. _Especially_ from Jim. He returned to the armchair that he had been so comfortably sitting in before he was interrupted and picked up his book. He folded his thin frame back onto the soft cushions and resumed reading.

After about fifteen minutes he heard a siren in the distance. The whining noise annoyed him so he got up to shut the window. Noise silenced, he continued with his book.

 

The white Thunderbird barrelled over a median, flattening a sapling, and took off down a side street. Tyres squealing, it slowed down slightly to make a sharp turn, cutting over someone’s lawn as it did.

”WOOO!” Iggy yelled, pushing down harder on the gas pedal. He was enjoying this. Someone had called the cops on him, but they were much too far behind to ever catch him. He careened through an alley, knocking down all the garbage cans there, and emerged from the other side onto the street he had been trying to reach.

He hurtled out into traffic, making the other cars swerve out of the way to avoid hitting him, and kept on at his current pace 91 mph, honks and curses trailing after him. All the drivers that spotted him in their mirrors got out of the way fast, giving him clear passage to the neighbourhood David was at.

The street name he was looking for came into view and he turned the wheel violently. The left tyres lifted off the ground slightly as the car hurtled onto the new street. He glanced at the numbers on the houses as he sped by. It would be one at the end.

The tile-roofed houses here were each as big as two regular ones, some larger even than that. Most had gates barring their driveways, and large palm trees in the courtyard. Iggy slowed the car as he neared the end of the street, searching for the correct number. He spotted it barely in time, and yanked the wheel hard to the right. Lucky for him the gates to the driveway were open a tad, and he rammed the beat up Thunderbird through them with a deafening crash. He slammed hard on the brakes and the car skidded to a stop in the middle of the front lawn, retaining just enough momentum to delicately knock over a stone birdbath before coming to rest. The tyres were smoking slightly and huge black skid marks glared up from the driveway behind the car.

 

David nearly jumped out of his skin when a thunderous crash from the driveway bombarded his ears. Book lying forgotten on the rug, he stared urgently out the front bay window of the house and was greeted with the sight of a smashed up white car sprawled, smoking, on the front lawn.

He tore out of the room flinging the front door open, and ran outside to survey the damage. The large iron gates at the end of the drive were now severely misshapen, one of them hanging precariously on a single twisted hinge. There were deep ruts in the once-perfect lawn (which David had even remembered to water that morning), and chunks of grass and mud were strewn everywhere. The birdbath was intact, but it would be a helluva job getting the heavy thing upright again.

Who the hell was the idiot behind the wheel? he wondered furiously. Just as he was stamping up to the car to find out, the driver’s door opened and a platinum blonde head came into view. David knew immediately who it was. “You’re fucking INSANE!” he yelled, “ _Look what you’ve done!_ This isn’t even my goddamned house!”

“I told you I was insane when we met, remember?” Jim replied nonchalantly.

 _And now I believe it,_ David fumed in his mind. “Do you even know how to drive?!” he demanded, sweeping a long-fingered hand to encompass the ruined yard.

Jim just gave him one of the doe-eyed ‘innocent-and-bewildered’ faces that he was so skilled at making.

Just then a neighbour popped his head over the high stucco wall that separated his property from David’s current residence. “Is everything all right? I got worried when I heard that crash.”

“Everything’s peachy,” David replied sourly, then added, “I’ve got it under control, don’t worry.” The neighbour raised an eyebrow, but nodded and left.

David turned back to Jim and glared at him. “YOU are paying for all of this... it’s YOUR mess,” he said fiercely.

“Oh I’ll be paying for it all right,” Jim said, unruffled. “The pigs are after me anyway and when they see this they’ll haul me off to the slammer for sure.” He shrugged. “I just wanted to see you,” he said simply.

 _Charming, but he’s not getting off the hook that easily,_ David thought. Despite this, he felt his anger towards Jim melting a little. He sighed and reached up to run a hand through his bright red hair and then stopped, remembering how long it had taken to style it that morning.

Jim abandoned the car and strode up to David, looking up at him with a winning (if rather high) smile. “Let’s go in,” he said, threading his arm through David’s and tugging at him, “Might as well spend some time together before I’m arrested.” David rolled his eyes, but led the way into the house anyway.

The interior was air-conditioned and shady, which was a welcome contrast to the dry, scorching midday heat outside, and the vaulted ceilings echoed emptily with their bare footsteps.

 

Iggy disengaged his arm from David’s and spun around once, gazing at the high ceiling. _I feel really funny,_ he thought, and he must have said it out loud too because David answered him. “I’m sure you do,” he said, “Come on, I bet you haven’t eaten recently.” He began to walk away to another part of the house and Iggy hurried after him. His depth perception was a little screwy and David seemed already to be very far away in the quiet house.

They went through a large open area full of chairs and small tables and eventually reached the spacious kitchen located on one corner of the house. The sun was streaming in through partially raised Venetian blinds, making a bright yellow pool on the floor by the window. Iggy was drawn to it like a moth and lay down in the patch of sunlight. He was feeling more subdued now than he had earlier and felt content to simply soak up the warmth, his brain buzzing lightly. He vaguely noticed David rummaging through the fridge and wondered what he was making.

Half a carrot. An orange. Sugar. Ice. All of these went into a blender. Iggy cringed and covered his ears when Dave turned the machine on – it seemed unnaturally loud in the otherwise silent kitchen.

Ears firmly plugged, Iggy watched the food in the blender slowly turn into an orangey goo. This got dull so he looked at David instead. He was wearing a form-fitting, long sleeved shirt made of some silvery material and had on small silver earrings to match. His hair was sprayed upright on top and tapered down his long neck in the back. It was roughly the same colour as the food in the blender. Iggy’s gaze wandered down. David’s pants were white and somewhat see-through, he noticed with amusement. They fit tightly on his ass and thighs, but flared out dramatically below the knee, and were just short of touching the floor.  
Having felt generally horny since he awoke, Iggy focused his attention on David’s shapely thighs, which were making their presence known despite being covered up. They looked especially large in the white fabric that covered them, and Iggy was admittedly fascinated by them, as he had been since he had first seen David perform in a skimpy outfit.

His objects of visual affection were disrupted when David walked across the kitchen to retrieve a glass from a cupboard. He returned and stopped the blender, pouring the glass full of the pureed plant matter, and then walked over to Iggy, kneeling down next to him. He put the glass on the floor and grabbed Iggy’s forearms, pulling him up to a sitting position. “Drink this,” he said, and handed Iggy the glass. “It’ll help you feel better.”  
Iggy blinked at him a few moments and then took the glass. He was feeling very hazy and a little sleepy. He could hardly think straight.  
“Just what was it that you took?” David asked him, his words not quite in sync with his mouth. Iggy didn’t reply, but sniffed experimentally at the contents of the glass and then took a small sip. It wasn’t as bad as he’d expected. Hardly any carrot flavour.

Suddenly David’s thighs loomed up at him again. They were very close now and it was hard to resist their call.

 

“You have such nice legs,” Jim sighed between sips of his drink, and to David’s surprise began to slide a hand up and down his thigh. The unexpected sensation both aroused and amused him, since he was fairly sure that this was only the drugs speaking. So far Jim hadn’t given any indication that he was anything other than straight. Slightly disappointing for David, as he rather fancied the bright-eyed singer, but what could one do?

“Thank you,” he said honestly in reply to Jim’s compliment and tried his best to ignore the continued rubbing. “Why don’t you finish that? I think you should sleep for a while,” he suggested.

Jim looked at the glass in his hand as though he’d forgotten it was there, considered it for a moment and then downed the rest of the drink in one swallow. His other hand never left David’s thigh.

David took the glass from him and set it on the floor, then grabbed the hand that was resting on his leg and pulled them both to their feet. “Come with me,” he said, and led Jim by the hand out of the kitchen and back towards the living room.

The sun had warmed up the sofa that sat by the bay window in the living room, and it was onto this that David gently pushed Jim. Jim looked sleepy and didn’t resist. He stretched out on the sofa with a deep sigh, his small, muscular frame leaving an uneven shadow on the floor next to the couch.

David picked up his book which was still lying on the floor where he’d dropped it and fell into his armchair once more. He’d only been reading for a minute when Jim’s voice floated over to him from the couch. “What are you reading?”

“A Clockwork Orange,” he answered, looking up from the book. Jim nodded slightly, then yawned and closed his eyes. The scene now in front of David was a bizarre and ironic tableau: on the couch lay a peacefully sleeping form, seemingly the picture of innocence. Out the open window behind him lay a panorama of violent destruction. It was almost comical. David returned to his book.

Jim did not wake for several hours.

 

When he did, he was feeling distinctly more Jim and less Iggy, though a current of drug-induced energy and weirdness was still in his blood. Other than the sun being slightly lower than it had been, all was as he had left it when he had drifted off: the car still out on the lawn, no cops to be seen, Dave still reading his book. He had almost finished it by that point, but seemed glad to see Jim awake again.

He smiled briefly, but warmly, over the top of his book and then continued reading. Jim smiled back at him and then stretched languidly, moving each limb in turn. His body felt sluggish and he wanted it to wake up. He stretched his arms over his head, arching his back a little, and his short t-shirt pulled up to reveal a strip of tan stomach. When he opened his eyes he found David glancing furtively at him, and he stuck out his tongue and grinned. He then sat up so that his back was to David and, perfectly aware of what he was doing, proceeded to pull his t-shirt back down with a ridiculous amount of care.

He then pretended to straighten out his clothes, luxuriously running his hands over himself and spending far too much time messing with the seat of his jeans. Unable to keep a naughty smirk from his face, he turned halfway around to look at David. His performance was having the intended effect. David looked flustered and annoyed.

“Are you asking for something or are you just teasing? You must tell me.” David implored him, looking a bit reproachful.

Jim gave him a smug look and proceeded to gaze out the front window. _I’m not really even sure myself, Davey-boy,_ he thought, laughing inwardly. He glanced back at David again. He was trying to read, but looked thoroughly distracted.

Jim was very much in the mood for pushing David’s buttons, which was rather easy to do if you knew how. He sauntered up to Dave’s armchair and snatched away his book saying, “You’re no fun. Stop reading.” David swiped at the book, but Jim backed quickly out of reach, dangling it at arm’s length.

“I don’t know why I put up with you,” David said angrily, getting up out of his chair as Jim backed further away. David stalked slowly towards him, then made a lunge, but Jim danced nimbly out of the way and ran out of the living room.

David followed hot behind him, dodging around several pieces of furniture and then up the long staircase. At the top landing, Jim paused, not knowing which way to go, and David tackled him from behind.

 

They hit the floor with a thud and David struggled to remain on top as Jim wriggled, facedown, beneath him. He managed to press Jim’s shoulders into the floor and he at last stopped struggling.

“You win,” he conceded.

“Will you stop being such a bloody tease and annoyance?” David demanded.

“Maybe I will and may—“

David dug his enamelled nails into Jim’s shoulders.

“OW! Ok! Ok! Jeez.”

David let go of Jim’s shoulders, but remained sitting on him. “Give me my book.”

Jim sighed and pulled it out from under his chest. David snatched it. He then rolled off of Jim and stood up.

“Aw come on, you’re not gonna keep reading that the whole time I’m here, are you?” Jim asked, a slight pleading note in his voice.

David sighed and regarded Jim from the corner of one eye, not replying immediately. His fine features were inscrutable. After a few moments he said: “I will stop reading if you will stop being ambiguous and tell me whether my attraction to you is a waste of time or not.” He looked at Jim pointedly, raising a non-existent eyebrow. There was no reason to beat around the bush any longer; Jim obviously knew how David felt.

Jim blushed a little at this blunt admission, having fully expected David to mince around the subject instead of getting to the point. To make things worse, his drug-induced outgoingness was fast fading and he was beginning to feel rather shy. “Uhmm...” he mumbled, not quite sure what to say.

“Yes...?” David prompted. “Will you tell me? Or should I go back downstairs and read my book?”

“No,” Jim replied quickly, standing up. Working up some courage he added rather brazenly, “Why don’t you show me what you queers do to each other behind closed doors.” An impish smirk played across his face. He looked at the carpet and then back up at David.

David was smiling now, too, and he said: “As you wish. Come with me.” He took Jim’s hand and swept him down a corridor whose entire left wall consisted of a window that looked down on the spacious backyard. Jim couldn’t help but notice the gigantic, sparkling swimming pool that lay there. He thought that it would be good to have a swim before he left.  
Soon his mind was far from swimming, however, as David brought him into a big, airy, white bedroom that had a windowed wall like the hallway. David smiled at him again and motioned to the huge bed that dominated the room, saying, “Make yourself comfortable.” He then went to the enormous window and proceeded to pull a set of sheer, filmy drapes across them.

Jim regarded the high bed for a moment, feeling sort of tingly with anticipation, and then jumped up on it. It was very soft and springy. He considered for a moment, and then peeled off his t-shirt and tossed it on the floor. He waited and stared at David’s legs, trying to get into the proper mood since he was feeling somewhat giddy.

As a last privacy measure David locked the bedroom door, not sure when his hosts might return. He then went to the bed and climbed on, scooting close to Jim. Jim felt a bit self-conscious with his shirt off now that David was right next to him, and David’s lustful, intense stare made his insides go to butterflies. He noticed that David’s pants were sticking straight out at the crotch.

David reached out and stroked Jim’s blonde hair affectionately, gently pushing it away from his eyes. “I love your eyes,” he said softly, and then leaned forward and kissed each of Jim’s eyelids in turn, leaving a third, chaste kiss on his mouth. Jim didn’t seem repulsed by this, so David moved closer, putting a hand between Jim’s legs to pry them open. Jim complied and David sat in front of him, wrapping his long legs around his waist.

David then unbuttoned his own shirt and pulled it off, exposing a flat, hairless chest and tiny red nipples. He put his hands on Jim’s tanned chest, lightly running his fingertips all over it, and slowly kneading the nipples with his thumbs.

Jim was breathing a little more heavily, and David hoped that meant he was turned on. He was alternately looking at David’s body and his eyes. David was feeling very horny and wanted to get closer, so he put his arms around Jim and pulled him nearer, pressing their chests and crotches hard together.

Jim inhaled sharply when David pushed his hard cock against his crotch, clothed though they were. _That_ was a new sensation, to say the least. David was squeezing him tightly, with his legs as well as his arms, and Jim soon felt him nuzzling his neck. A hot, wet tongue and lips began to slide over his shoulder and up along his jaw, sucking and licking insistently.  
Jim experimentally reached behind David with both hands and grabbed his ass, squeezing it and pushing himself onto David’s erection. He started getting hard himself after he did this and groaned quietly.

“Are you enjoying this?” David murmured in his ear, pausing momentarily from kissing his neck.

“Yes,” Jim replied and then said again, “Yeah.”

David gave him one more hard suck on his neck and then pulled back slightly so that they were face to face. Big doe-like blue eyes gazed into narrow asymmetrical ones for a few moments and then David leaned in and kissed Jim softly on the lips.

Jim felt David’s tongue on his lips and opened his mouth, putting his own tongue out. He was getting harder by the minute and began grinding his hips against David’s, his heart beating fast.

David broke their kiss and leaned back onto the bed, spreading his legs and pulling Jim on top of him. His bright red hair fanned out on the blanket, framing his long graceful neck and finely-boned face. He gazed up affectionately at Jim and then put a hand behind his head and pulled it down so that Jim’s ear was next to his mouth. “Fuck me,” he whispered.  
Jim couldn’t have been stiffer when he heard this, and was filled with a sudden intense lust for the beautiful person lying so submissively underneath him. He attacked David’s face and neck with violent kisses and bites and said between ragged breaths, “I’ll fuck you senseless...”

He hoisted himself off of David and hastily began undoing his fly. He pulled his pants down and off along with his underwear and tossed them on the floor with his shirt. He then unzipped David’s pants and ripped them off of him, flinging them aside. He lowered himself onto David again for a moment, kissing him hard and enjoying the feeling of their naked bodies pressing together. When he came up, both of their stomachs were slick with pre-cum.

David pointed to the bedside table and Jim saw a small jar of Vaseline there. He grabbed it and greased himself up, then tentatively put his hand on David’s cock, stroking it and rubbing the lubrication around the tip. David arched his back and groaned, closing his eyes. He then felt Jim slide a finger up his ass and wiggle it a bit, and he had to concentrate hard to keep from ejaculating. Jim pushed his finger in further and David squirmed with pleasure and whimpered, about to lose it. Jim continued teasing him for a few more minutes and then abruptly pulled his finger out, shoved David’s legs into the air and pushed his cock as far as it would go into David’s ass.

David came instantly, his back arching, hot sticky white spurting on his stomach. Jim came four strokes later, thrusting forcefully against David as he did. Gradually his hips stopped bucking and he pulled out, his cock limp, and lay down next to David. They looked at each other and smiled, both flushed and panting.

“That was good, huh?” David said between breaths. Jim nodded emphatically. He scooted closer and began kissing David again. As the kiss got passionate, Jim crawled partially on top of David and began sliding his hand down the other’s body towards his crotch. He suddenly felt warm stickiness on his fingers and lifted his hand away.

He had an idea. Keeping his eyes on David’s, he licked his hand clean. He then moved his face close to David’s stomach and began to very slowly lick the cum from it. David watched him intently the entire time, getting more and more aroused.

By the time Jim was finished, both their cocks were standing straight up again. David sat up and slid off the bed. “Come here,” he said, motioning for Jim to follow him. Jim likewise slid to the floor, and David took him by the shoulders and turned him around so that he was facing the bed. He then pressed himself up against Jim, wrapping an arm around his waist and burying his face in the other’s hair. After holding him like this for a few moments, he wriggled his hips forward, pushing his cock into Jim’s ass, while his other hand travelled down to Jim’s crotch.

Once he was in, David had the urge to start wildly thrusting, but instead moved his hips with agonizing slowness, milking Jim at the same speed with his hand. He wanted it to last. Desire swept through him like a wave as he fucked Jim, and he started biting the other’s neck and shoulders. After several minutes of slow fucking David felt the tension build to an intolerable level. Right at that moment Jim writhed and groaned loudly, which in turn made David ejaculate. An involuntary whimper escaped his throat as he spurted, and he grabbed Jim tightly about the waist and held him until the spasms died down. Jim came a few seconds after David, shooting off onto the bedclothes.

 

They remained where they were for a while, sweaty and panting, their hot bodies temporarily melted together in the afterglow of sex. David almost fell asleep on his feet, but snapped out of the warm, peaceful daze and separated himself from Jim. Jim was leaning against the bed and David stroked his back and said, “Why don’t we take a nap now?” He leaned in to kiss Jim on the cheek, but Jim stepped away from him, turned around, and slumped to the floor, a dismayed look on his face. “What have I done?” he asked of no one in particular.

“Jim...” David said, his brow furrowing. What was he on about? David thought he’d liked it. Jim glanced at him, and then buried his face in his hands with an unhappy sigh.

“Jim,” David said again, and knelt down next to him. He was concerned; he really didn’t want this to end badly. He put a hand on Jim’s shoulder, but Jim shoved it away. “Don’t touch me,” he said.

David stared in sad surprise at him for a few moments, then stood up and gathered his clothes. This could ruin their friendship. He’d seen it happen before. He thought carefully as he dressed himself and then stated firmly to the open air, “This never happened.” It broke his heart to say it, but what else could he do? He might never see Jim again otherwise.

He chanced another look at Jim, but the other wouldn’t acknowledge him at all. _Another failed attempt at love,_ he thought miserably to himself. He felt like crying, but denied the tears and headed for the bedroom door. Just before he exited he had a thought. “Come down whenever you like,” he said, “We can... find something to eat.” His voice sounded hollow even to him, but he clung to the hope that perhaps they could begin mending this rift before the day was over. Jim still wouldn’t acknowledge him, so he quietly exited, shutting the door behind him.

Jim’s mind kept replaying what they’d done and he couldn’t rid himself of the nagging little voice telling him what a pervert he was. He thought he’d long gotten over all the shit he’d been raised on, but apparently it still lingered somewhere in the back of his mind. _Goddamn it, I’m such a dick,_ he thought. _He finally admits he digs me and I go and reject him to his face. Even worse, we fucked! Why the hell did I do that, anyway?? Jeesus!_ He grabbed handfuls of his hair and tugged with all his might.

 _No,_ he argued with himself, _it’s not perverted and I did it because I wanted to! But I still can’t believe that I did it. Why am I wigging out? I must seem like some idiot Yankee redneck... this is just normal stuff to him._ He sighed and got to his feet. _I guess I’m just worried about people finding out and treating me oddly. No one has to know, though, do they?_ He brightened at this thought. _I’m not telling, and neither will he, so..._

He continued to think about this as he crawled back onto the bed, trying to convince himself to just let go and realise that yes, it had been fun, and no, he shouldn’t give a rat’s ass about what anybody else thought on the subject.

He buried his face in the part of the blankets that David had been lying on and inhaled his scent. It turned him on. _And there’s nothing wrong with that,_ he told himself. _Right?_

He rested his head on his arms and fell asleep after a few minutes, contradictory thoughts still running through his head.

He awoke about fifteen minutes later feeling relaxed, though that quickly dissipated when he remembered where he was. Presently, he hopped down from the bed, grabbing his clothes and putting them on. _I hope he doesn’t kick me out of the house,_ he thought, _I think I deserve it..._

He hesitated at the top of the stairs, wishing he didn’t have to face David, but made his way down anyway. He’d have to get it over with _some_ time.

He peered cautiously around a corner into the living room and discovered David lying on his stomach on the sofa, staring into space. His book was lying in front of him, but he didn’t seem very interested in it. He seemed to be thinking deeply, and looked rather unhappy.

Jim stepped into the room, clearing his throat lightly to announce his presence. David quickly changed his expression and turned to look at Jim, but neither of them could make eye-contact for very long. “Hungry?” David asked.

“Yeah.” Jim replied.

“Come on, then.” David said, and heaved himself off the couch. He made for the kitchen. Jim followed.

David dug around in the fridge and found lettuce, tomato, cheese and ham, as well as some bread on the counter. The two made sandwiches and ate them in silence. As Jim was finishing his second sandwich, David attempted conversation.

“When do you suppose the police will come?”

 _Great topic,_ Jim thought, but answered anyway. “Hopefully not any time soon...” He popped the rest of the sandwich into his mouth. Silence prevailed once again. After a few minutes, David tried again to make conversation.

“What do you think of the house? Have you seen the pool?”

A rather more promising topic. Jim shook his head. David asked: “Would you like to see it?” Jim nodded. David was relieved that he’d finally gotten through. Perhaps the situation would turn out alright. The two got up from the table and he led the way to the backyard. He opened the sliding glass door and they stepped outside.

The sun was shining bright and hot, making pale, swirling patterns on the bottom of the large pool. The pool was about 14’ across and 18’ long and had a diving board at one end and wide steps at the other. It was very deep. There were several palm trees around the yard’s tall stone wall, but they didn’t provide much shade, and the cement around the pool was blistering.

“Whoa! Shit!” Jim exclaimed when his bare feet touched it.

“Ouch! Let’s get onto the grass,” David said, hopping back and forth from one foot to the other. The two scurried over to the lawn that covered the half of the yard the pool was not in. The warm grass was a relief from the scorching hot pavement.

The two began a leisurely pace across the lawn, still uneasy looking at each other. David glanced at Jim, hoping he would break the silence first, but Jim showed no intention of doing so. David couldn’t suppress a sigh.  
Jim had been hoping that David would do the talking, and even though he hadn’t ventured a word, that sigh spoke volumes. Jim was feeling guiltier by the minute about how he’d acted in the bedroom, but he couldn’t bring himself to mention it, so their walk continued for several more silent minutes until he happened to glance at David and saw that the sad expression was back on his face. That was enough. Jim felt like a total creep and wanted the awkwardness gone, once and for all.

“Hey,” he said, “it looks like there’s something at the bottom of the pool.”

“Where?” David asked and looked towards the pool, curiosity overtaking the melancholy in his face.

“Let’s go look,” Jim replied vaguely and started towards the edge of the pool. His feet were burning, but he had a plan.

David followed him and stood with him at the edge of the pool. “I don’t see anything... where is— FUCK!“ Jim shoved him into the pool as he was looking for the non-existent object. As he came sputtering to the surface, Jim let out a whoop and jumped in himself, grabbing a hold of David as he went down.

Being underwater was an extreme contrast to the hot, dry air above, and despite being pissed off at Jim, David couldn’t help but enjoy it. His surprised anger melted as Jim grinned at him underwater and stuck out his tongue, bubbles escaping from his partially open mouth. His blonde hair was floating like seaweed around his face, glowing with the diluted underwater sunlight.

Their clothing was weighing them down and they needed air, so they let go of each other and kicked hard for the surface. When they finally reached it they gasped for air and laughed, trying to keep afloat in their waterlogged clothes. The tension between them was broken.

When David caught his breath he said, “Let’s get some of this weight off,” and headed for the side of the pool. Jim followed him. They heaved themselves up out of the water and, with a bit of difficulty peeled off their sopping shirts. They then slipped back into the pool and Jim started swimming for the deep end. David hurried to catch up to him and reached the far wall of pool just as Jim was climbing out to get on the diving board. David knew a good opportunity when he saw it, and just as Jim was about to jump off, David gave him a hard shove into the water from behind. He quickly followed, finishing his revenge by grabbing Jim’s leg as he sank past him, pulling him down to the bottom.

It got darker the deeper you got in the pool, and even in the middle of the afternoon it looked almost like twilight at the bottom of the deep end. Watching David in the cool, silent darkness Jim made his final decision about what had happened earlier. He _did_ feel attracted to David; inhibitions be damned. Especially since David’s white pants were even more transparent when wet. He wondered if David realised this. He was glad for the haziness of the water because he felt himself blushing.

Air was running out and they kicked for the surface again. “It’s great down there... let’s see how long we can last,” David suggested. He took a deep breath and went underwater again, swimming for the bottom of the pool. He touched the bottom and turned around. Jim was right behind him. Much to David’s surprise, Jim swam right up to him and wrapped his arms around his waist, pulling them together, and gave him a firm kiss on the mouth. David jerked his head back with surprise, but Jim held him even more tightly and pressed their lips together again. David’s surprise quickly turned to lust and he began to reciprocate passionately.

A steady stream of bubbles were escaping their lungs as they kissed and soon they needed to breathe, so they broke apart momentarily to return to the surface. They came up under the diving board and David led Jim to a small underwater ledge underneath it. They sat there looking at each other for a few moments until David said, “Well, aren’t you going to finish what you started?” He suppressed a wide smile.

“Of course...” Jim murmured, moving through the water to straddle David’s lap. He gently pushed him against the edge of the pool and captured his mouth in a wet, open-mouthed kiss. The weightlessness created by the water was causing Jim to float above David as opposed to actually touching him, so David wriggled his hands into Jim’s back pockets and pulled him down so their crotches were pressed together. Jim wriggled his hips forward and gripped David with his legs so they wouldn’t float apart again.

Their kiss became tongue-y and aggressive and their hands wandered all over each other, stroking and squeezing in the lukewarm water. After a while, Jim broke the kiss, and David looked at him quizzically. Jim put a hand under David’s chin and began to push it up. David obligingly tilted his head, resting it on the edge of the pool and Jim hungrily attacked his neck, sucking painfully on the soft skin. He also started humping David’s lap, thrusting roughly through their clothing.

When they were both hard, Jim pushed away from David slightly and grabbed his crotch with one hand. He began rubbing vigorously as he kissed him all over his face. David closed his eyes and groaned, digging into Jim’s back with his nails.

Jim unzipped David’s fly, took a deep breath and went underwater to try out an idea he’d just had.

David felt hands on his cock and then felt the enveloping heat of a mouth as Jim began to suck him off. Each suck was drawn-out and forceful, and David had to look up at the underside of the diving board to keep from immediately having an orgasm. Jim came up as quickly as he could for a breath, but the wait seemed like forever to David, who had to resist the urge to push Jim’s head back down. When he continued it felt even better than before, and it was only a matter of moments before David exploded into his mouth.

Jim came up coughing rather violently and it took him several moments to catch his breath. He then focused his attention on David, who was lying limp against the side of the pool with his eyes closed, a blissfully relaxed expression on his face. Jim snorted with mirth. “Drown me, why don’t you,” he murmured, pressing himself against David for a kiss. David smiled into the kiss and then lazily stuck out his tongue for Jim to suck on. The sloppy kissing went on until David grabbed Jim’s crotch and squeezed. “Your turn,” he announced with a naughty smirk.

They were just switching places when they heard loud banging through the open sliding-glass door. They both jumped at the noise.

Jim sighed, annoyed. “Shit. That’s probably the police.”

“Damn it,” David said. He suddenly looked very worried. “We can’t answer the door like this. What we’re doing is illegal...”

“God-damn it, that’s right, it is!” Jim said angrily, and abruptly heaved himself out of the pool. His erection was glaringly obvious. He tried to think un-sexual thoughts and looked around desperately for a garden hose.  
David zipped up his fly and climbed out of the pool, hurrying to get their shirts. “Put it on,” he said, and tossed Jim’s to him.

Jim wriggled into his damp t-shirt and asked urgently, “Is there a hose here somewhere?” More banging came from the front door.

“Great idea!” David said and ran around the side of the house. He returned dragging a green garden hose with a sprayer on the end. As they took turns blasting each other with the hose, the frigid water worked its magic on their insistent erections, leaving them only with goose-pimples and dripping hair.

Even louder pounding issued from the front of the house, and they dropped the hose and hurried inside. They minced across the tile floor, trying not to slip on their wet feet and got to the front door as fast as they could. David made to open it, but hesitated a moment. He looked at Jim and said, “I’ll bail you out.” He leaned over and gave Jim a quick, affectionate kiss before composing himself and opening the door.  
Two police officers stood on the step wearing stern expressions. A moustached one said to David, “May we come in?”

“Yes, of course,” David replied politely, opening the door wider and stepping aside. The officers entered the house, looking oddly at the two of them before getting down to business.

“Which of you was driving the white car that’s outside?” one asked, looking back and forth between the two.

Jim responded immediately. “I was.” he said, showing not a hint of shame or embarrassment.

“You are under arrest for reckless driving and destruction of public and private property.” The moustached officer said. His partner pulled out a pair of handcuffs. Jim obligingly put his hands behind his back, and the officer started to put them on him while the other recited his list of rights.

The policemen began to lead Jim out of the house and he turned and winked at David as if to say “See you soon!”, before disappearing out the front door. One of the officers gave David a very odd look before he left, which David didn’t quite understand. He didn’t think he looked _that_ weird, other than being sopping wet. As he closed the door he thought happily about what he and Jim might do together after he bailed him out.

He suddenly blushed furiously when it hit him that he was wearing wet, _white_ pants.

The End.

 

**Author's Note:**

> WARNING:  
> Internalised homophobia
> 
>  
> 
> For more Bowie fanfic, head on over to LJ: [BowieFic](http://www.livejournal.com/community/bowiefic/)


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